A healthy give-and-take relationship is like yin and yang – giving and taking, back and forth. But what does it really look like in practice?
For example, one friend may always listen and empathize when another needs to vent, which contributes to a balanced friendship.
The Giver
Jonas is a young and bright child who lives in the Community. It is a utopian though totalitarian society that values sameness. Citizens dress the same, live in identical dwellings and do not experience emotions or see color. The only person with knowledge of the outside world is The Giver, who transmits his memories to Jonas.
The Giver has nurturing abilities accompanied with love and care for everyone around him. This is displayed when he takes in Gabriel temporarily so his parents can rest. He also transmits the memory of sailing to Gabriel when he is crying.
A giver will always try to show their partner that they love them. They will surprise them with gifts and remember the small things about their relationship. However, sometimes a giver may be taken advantage of by a taker who doesn’t reciprocate. This can lead to a toxic relationship. The giver can feel drained and may not get enough love back in return.
The Taker
Givers are often drawn to takers because they offer a challenge and opportunity for growth. However, if the balance is too skewed it can lead to resentment and burnout for both parties. Striking a healthy balance is essential for both givers and takers to thrive in relationships.
A give and take relationship means that each person provides love, support, and companionship to the other. Takers, on the other hand, are entirely centered around using their partner for their own selfish purposes. They’ll use them until they can no longer rely on them for their needs, or until they’ve drained the giver completely.
To a taker, everything that’s good in life comes at a price. Their sense of value is based on what they can get from other people, and they’re not very understanding when their partners aren’t there for them. If you find yourself in a relationship with a taker, don’t ignore the warning signs – it won’t be long before they run out of steam.
The Relationship
When both parties can give and take at the right level, the relationship thrives. But it isn’t always easy to find that balance. The more one-sided a relationship is, the more likely it is to fizzle out over time.
A healthy level of give and take is essential to all relationships, including those in the workplace. In fact, a good level of give and take is one of the key ingredients to a strong work culture.
It might be as simple as watching the movie your friend wants to see or choosing a restaurant your partner prefers. But it can also be more substantial, such as moving across the country for your partner’s job. That’s the kind of big sacrifice Horne plans to explore in her upcoming study on couples who relocate for one another. She’ll follow 150 couples over a year to see how their relationships change as a result. The goal is to understand how they adapt their expectations to fit a new reality and what impact that has on their satisfaction.
The Balance
There are givers and takers in every relationship. A healthy balance is where the two people equally put in the same amount of effort and energy into the friendship. A friendship where one friend is overflowing with giving and the other takes compulsively will eventually cause the taker to feel used or drained.
As a result, they may pull away or leave the relationship. In these cases, the giver will realize that they have to step back and give space in order to preserve their own self-worth.
Having an equal balance of giving and taking is the basis for all healthy relationships. This gives each partner a sense of mutual respect and appreciation, fostering trust and loyalty between them. It also helps to ensure that everyone’s basic needs are being met. As the old saying goes, “You reap what you sow.” This is true for all relationships, including those between friends. Katherine oversees the sales, marketing and client services teams at The Balance, a Dotdash Meredith company. She has held leadership positions in financial media sales and started her career in digital advertising.what does a give-and-take relationship look like